Fear of dying
by cled
Summary: Tanzi Malfoy has a harsh life on Hogwarts, rigth now It's just a one shot but maybe if enugth people wnats it I'll write some more thanks to bex this is a pretty good story, oh yeah and sorry of my miss spell name on Blaise zabin It's rater T


Fear of Dying

Tanzi Malfoy walked the halls of Hogwarts slowly. Her long blond hair fell over her shoulders. She was quite beautiful even though she is just in her fifth year. She held some books in her arms close to her chest as she walked with her head bent low.

She hated this school, except from her first years, really it was more or less these last few years it had started good, being a Malfoy wasn't that bad then, until they found out about her father being a death eater. She had lost her friends, even the best once just because of him.

She was a Ravenclaw. That was why her father hated her so, but now she was also called things such as 'slut' 'bimbo' or sometimes even worse, a "pure blooded Malfoy?" Why should she carry on walking these halls? Why couldn't she just die? That was her plan this year, either way she would take the simple way out….

To die, that would be her next big plan, lose all that was her and get away from all the bulling, beating and even several hexes. Not the good ones either if that's what you think. A couple of times she got her nose crushed. So why stop them? She saw the way teachers looked at her and her brother Draco. They were not welcome here anymore.

All because of a name, a name that once was a good name to have, but now nothing good came out of it.

She looked up as she stood just outside the great hall watching everyone inside. All of these people sitting there and not one of them liked her. Did they think she was a death eater? No. she would never become one of them no matter what they thought. She turned her gaze towards where her brother sat and by the look on his face, knew instantly that he was worried about her. She knew he would eventually find out her plan anyhow. As Draco moved his head to look towards her, she turned to face the direction of the Griffingdore table and almost wanted to vomit.

Draco watched Tanzi's face very closely and smiled weakly seeing her gaze, wanting to help her anyway he could to take away her suffering. As she turned her head he followed her direction and to his horror saw the "Golden Trio", more like Scarhead, Weasel and Mudblood. He knew for a fact that both Scarhead and Weasel bullied his sister and he would give anything to snap their wands in half if they ever hexed or hurt her in anyway again.

As she slowly walked into the Great Hall, she kept her head down to keep little attention brought to her as possible. However, as people walked by her they slammed into her shoulders and afterwards would whisper behind her back. She heard them.

She always heard them.

Mean things. No matter how hard you try to ignore them and forget them, you always remember the mean things. She had given up fighting them, what was the point? In the start she had shouted back at everyone who whispered things about her, but the more she shouted the louder they spoke. They knew nothing about her and everything they spoke of where just some rumors were being spread.

One rumor she remembered being said by Ron Weasley. Aka Weasel, was that she had slept with someone and had a different boy every night.

However they knew nothing about her and everything they spoke of were just some rumor being spread.

That was not true, not true at all. She had never slept with a guy before. Secretly though she did have a boyfriend, of course nobody knew, not even Draco and he was the guys' best friend. Eventually, she choose to sit down with her back against the trio and as she sat down the people closest to her move away like she was some kind of poisonous disease. She looked over at her brother again almost pleading him to come.

Draco sensed someone staring at him and took one look at Tanzi and knew exactly what she was trying to tell him. He slowly excused himself from his fellow Slytherin's and sat down next to his sister. She always looked so scared, hurt and lonely. Draco gave her a little smile and grabbed her hand while slowing saying, "Something you want to tell me?"

As he waited, she turned around to look into his grey eyes, and then looked over her shoulder at the trio. Trying to cheer her up Draco smiled and decided to try and make her laugh. "Girl, you want to kill somebody?" he asked with a smirk on his face hinting towards the trio. However, his planned backfired when she turned around and stared into his eyes and said very fast, "Just Myself!" Draco just stared at his sister with wide eyes in shock as this was not something he was expecting. Slowly he came back to his senses when he said. "Please stop talking shit, you don't mean it." She looked with him with sad eyes and just replied, "I'm not and I do!"

Draco looked at he, he didn't know what to say. He just wanted to call her mad or crazy, anything to make her see sense, but first he would hex the whole darn school. It was their fault they had turned her into this person. She was beautiful, smart, funny and nice before, but now she was like a completely different person, she even thought she was ugly. They only hated her and caused her to be an outsider because she was a Malfoy. He wanted to stand up and shout at them and tell them she was nothing like their father.

Tanzi looked at Draco and started to cry, she had never cried in public before. She always refused to give them the satisfactory of letting them know they were getting to her.

Draco seeing she had started to cry, pulled her close to him and held her, while glaring towards the Gryffindor table.

As Harry looked up, what he saw in front of him was not something he expected.

Usually, Tanzi sat by herself reading or just simply staring into space in front of her, but not this time. Instead he saw a clearly hurt Draco hugging a tearful Tanzi, he could see the hurt and anger in Draco's eyes. If looks could kill, he would surely be killed in an instant.

Tanzi's face was buried into Draco's shoulder, while he held her closer. Harry didn't know what to think, he knew it must have to have something to do with the things he, Ron and the rest of the school had done to this beautiful Malfoy girl.

Draco quickly glanced back at Tanzi and wiped away her tears that slowly ran down her face. He decided it was time to go out of the great hall. He grabbed her hand and walked her out, he didn't want these people to hurt his sister anymore, he took her out before she would get any worse and give the school more reason to bully her.

After going out of the Great Hall, Tanzi sat down against the cold wall and looked up at her brother. She couldn't tell him her true reason for her feelings to kill herself, as knowing Draco he would go get himself into trouble for sticking up for her, so she decided to lie. "I'm not doing this because of them Draco."

Draco looked over at her with a sad face, "Then what's the fucking reason you're doing this?" She cleared her throat and wiped away the tears before answering, "I mean, you get 16 years of having a good time." She stopped and looked down, she knew that he knew she was lying but carried on anyway, "Then 60 running away from death?" She gazed back into his eyes and ended it by saying "I'm going to quit while I'm ahead."

Draco looked at her like she was crazy but hugged her close anyway as if to squeeze all her mental thoughts out of her mind. "I know you're lying, please don't say things like that," he whispered slowly into her ear while hugging her even closer.

Meanwhile all this time the school bullied Tanzi, Blaize had looked after both Draco and Tanzi. He didn't understand why people would hurt this girl. She was a sweet and innocent girl, just with a bad family name. It wasn't her fault. It's not like she choose to be born into that family. She didn't force her dad to become a death eater, so why couldn't these people just leave her alone?

He grabbed Pansy's arm and gave her a look that said 'common'. Pansy looked strangely at Blaize but got up anyway and followed him to where they found Draco and Tanzi.

Tanzi looked up as she saw Draco's friends standing in front of her and gave them a smile, clearly fake. Pansy walked over and laid a hand on her shoulder, "You want me to hex them for you?" she asked slowly and gave the smaller Malfoy girl a smile. Somehow Pansy had always been there for her, even though she was a bitch, but still, she was the only girly friend she had.

Blaize looked at the concerned face on his best friend and looked back at Tanzi.

Deciding to find out what had happened now, he asked, "What's wrong Draco," but it was too late as Draco was already heading back towards the great hall with a determined look on his face. Blaize knew when not to get in his way, and this was definitely not a day to stand in the way of Draco Lucius Malfoy.

As Draco got into the Great Hall, he drew out his wand and walked over to where Scarhead and his dummy followers sat.

He pointed his wand straight at Scarhead and Weasel and shouted, "WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?" Draco could see the shocked face on Potter and realized he didn't understand any of the things Draco was shouting about.

Harry looked up, stunned at what Draco had just said and looked like. He had never seen Draco looking so sad and angry before. The way his eyes glared daggers at him quite frankly scared him. Draco may have his wand pointing at himself and his friends, but it was as if Draco was mad at them all, the whole the school infact.

"You and your so called friends have ruined her…. Potter YOU have ruined my sister, there is nothing left of the Tanzi I used to know. Nothing at all..." Draco was almost breaking down and Harry could clearly see it. "...and it's not only you, it's this whole bloody school that has hurt her, humiliated her and god knows what else you have done to her, she is a human being Potter, she is my little sister and she can only take so much before she breaks." He moved his wand out of Harry's face but turned it on Ron and said a short spell that Harry couldn't quite hear.

He turned around just in time to see Ron flying backwards towards a table, but then he turned back round to found Draco was now again pointing his wand at him.

"What are you doing?" he asked slowly, but Draco started to walked closer towards him, while still pointing his wand with shaking hand out of anger, "I should have killed you, but I'm not the murderer kind of person, I should have drowned you, I should have done something, anything for what you have done towards my sister". Draco glared at him, and then slammed his fist right into Harry's eye. Everyone in the Great Hall stared in shock with wide eyes, but Draco just turned around and walked away still angry with himself. As he passed by people he just glared at them, daring them to fight him.

Watching from a distance, Tanzi watched with shocked as Draco walked towards herself, Blaize and Pansy. They didn't know what to say or do. They just all stood there like fishes hovering on a spot. Tanzi knew her brother had a temper, but he had never been this bad before and it scared her.

As Draco reached Tanzi, Blaize and Pansy, he saw the face his sister was giving him and knew that she didn't like the way he had dealt with all of this.

His head fell down in shame and slowly said in a low whisper, "sorry, I…they…. I'm sorry."

Slowly, Tanzi walked closer to him and gave him a smile and then a hug, what else could she do?

Then out of nowhere she moved out of his grip and ran, she knew exactly where to run...

The Black Lake, the only place she could die in peace. She ran through the halls of the school that had caused her so much pain and suffering fast, she could hear portraits shout that she had class and stuff in an hour.

She didn't care to really get what they were saying really, all she wanted to do was get out of here. Then it kind of froze down her back as she went through a ghost she looked up at the familiar ghost of the fair lady in white no one other than her knew her real name though. This ghost was one of the founders of Hogwarts she was Rowena Ravenclaw, "why such a rush Tanzi?" Rowena asked slowly and smiled to her.

Trough her years at Hogwarts Rowena had been her friend, her real friend Tanzi looked up at her then down. "I going to do it today, I gone kill myself…." She stopped and took a deep breath "and don't start with the whole thing of me telling my brother again pleas, I've told him okay he looked at me like I was crazy" she said soft.

Rowena looked tough full at her for a while then slowly said "You have to remember one important thing Tanzi…. " Rowena moved closer to the girl and looked into her eyes, Rowena's eyes where deep blue like an ocean they were truly beautiful, just like herself. "The worst thing that could happen is not that you kill yourself darling, but that you takes somebody with you when you die" Okay!!!! That really did make no sense to Tanzi.

Draco had been standing there as shocked as ever he then finally got his legs to work, he ran away from Blaize and Pansy he knew exactly what his sister was going to do. He ran as fast as he could even though that wasn't fast enough in his head it felt like he was walking, to slow.

Tanzi looked at Rowena then gave her a weak smile, she knew Rowena wouldn't stop her but she also knew she would alert the teachers, but she didn't mind really. She turned around and started to run again.

She ran away from Rowena though the words she had spoken ran through her head, what the hell should that mean?

As she ran down towards the lake she could hear the words of her parents, her brother, even Harry and Ron who tried to either help or destroy her life through the years at Hogwarts echoing in her head.

She glanced at the lake and took a hesitated step forwards slowly. Looking at the railings she grabbed onto them and climb over them to the other side. As she looked down into the dark water, she was sure it was calling out to her, daring her to jump.

She glanced into the water watching her memories float by away from her. What was she doing here? She suddenly thought. She couldn't go through with this, it would kill her brother, and she couldn't do that to him. Slowly, she turned back around to climb back over when suddenly out of nowhere, she slipped and fell back screaming into the water, while in the distance was the farthing voice of her brother screaming, her name.

Draco had been running all the way, he knew exactly where to go. As he was running he saw her go to the other side of the bewitched railings, all he could think of was screaming, "NOOOOO TANNNNNNN," but she wouldn't hear. He ran as fast as his legs could carry him. Sure he was a wizard, but in times like these, that didn't even cross his mind.

He couldn't think straight, he saw her turn around as if to climb back over, and then out of nowhere she fell into the black water. He raced towards her, leaping over the railings and diving into the black water, reaching out as far as he could for her hand. She had given up, she wasn't struggling but had simply accepted death, sinking faster and faster. She looked up at him, he didn't know what to do, something in the water had grabbed onto her foot pulling her further away from him.

The mermaids had seen the girl by the lake so many times, itching to drown her soul in the black lake forever. They had grabbed onto her dragging her further down as she blacked out.

Draco swam the best he could, but he couldn't hold his breath for much longer now. He looked at her and refused to give up, this was his sister, he wouldn't lose her. Somehow the strength came back to him, though he was feeling more and more lightheaded as he just managed to grab onto her hand.

Strangely enough he had managed to grab onto her arm, pull her out of the arms of the mermaids, aswell as starting to head back up to the surface. He gazed down at the familiar face held in his arms, his sister who had now blacked out, looking peaceful as if asleep.

Blaize, Pansy, Hermione, Ron and Harry had watched the whole bloody scene, Harry and Ron had lost it, just standing there in shock wide-eyed, while the two girls had broke into a run to get the teachers. The trio had followed Blaize and Pansy down to the lake because they wanted revenge. Ron had mumbled something to himself about Tanzi ruining his life. His whole bloody life, but when he had seen her fall he just stared in shock.

Blaize had started to run like hell towards the lake, he couldn't lose either Draco or Tanzi, they meant to much to him. Tan was his girl while Draco was like a brother to him. Draco had always been there for him, even when he was ugly. With these thoughts running through his mind, he dived into the black water. He reached Draco who had grabbed hold of his sister while doing a charm to prevent the mermaids and other creatures from harming them.

Amazingly he had managed to do all that without a wand, Draco had used wandless magic, eventhough he had his wand in his hand, but Blaze could clearly see it was broken. Blaize managed to get them both to the surface. Sense returned to Ron and Harry and they helped Blaize pull Tanzi out of the water thinking that Draco would manage to pull himself out. However, when Blaize turned around to pat Draco on the back, there was noone there except for Dracos broken wand left forgotten on the side.

Draco smiled as he watched them pull Tanzi out of the cold water, he held tightly onto the side with his wand in his hand. He was exhasted, slowly closing his eyes he felt his grib loosen and let go of his wand leaving it behind on the side. He took one last glance at his sister and smiled then slowly slipped back into the water unnoticed. It was like he couldn't move a mussel, he felt so heavy, he didn't struggle, didn't fight the water, he didn't need to, his sister was safe, even if it was with Potter.

It was so peaceful in the water. No Potter, no nagging mom who wanted him to be perfect, just because she didn't think Tanzi was perfect didn't mean he had to be. No dad telling him to kill someone or become someone he didn't want to become…… no everything was peaceful for once in his life.

Wait though... he couldn't die down here, he had to fight, he needed to be with Tanzi, to look after her and keep her safe. He suddenly felt a huge pain in his stomach as one of the mermaids stabbed him in the back. All around him now was red. "Blood" he simply thought, a smirk formed on his face as he took his last look on the world.

Blaize had now dived after his best friend, heavy armed with his wand he casted a spell to make the creatures run or rather swim away as fast as they could from the now unconscious Draco Malfoy. Blaize tried to wake him up while still in the water, no help there though. He finally got them both up and out of the water.

Harry looked down at Tanzi she was gorgeous really, why had they called her such a thing as a *skank*, *Whore* and an *Ugly pureblood Malfoy* or whatever lame and nasty stuff to make her feel low and unworthy of her house and even school.

While everything was going on outside Hermione and Pansy were running as fast as they could and almost ran into the first teachers they came across. Without pausing to take a breath they shouted "Draco/Malfoy… water… Tanzi… help". Well that was all Dumbledore and Snape managed to hear before all four started to run, Snape knew if something happened to either of the Malfoy kids something terrible was going to happen to Hogwarts.

While they ran down the long hill they could all see Harry and Ron standing over the unconscious Tanzi Malfoy, but where was Draco and Blaize? Then out of nowhere Blaize threw himself out of the black water while clinging onto a bloody Draco Lucius Malfoy in his arms. Hermione let out a gasp as she looked at Draco, he looked so helpless.

Pansy sunk down next to Draco and moved her smooth hand to Draco's now paler than normal neck, she pressed two fingers to his neck looking for pulse, but before moving her fingers away she broke into tears. She couldn't stop the tears falling down her face, it was like she herself was crying a lake to drown in. She had always loved Draco deeply.

While the teachers went over to take care of Tanzi, Blaize collapsed down by Draco on his other side, but while Pansy was holding onto Draco for dear life, Blazie just brushed away some of Draco's hair out of his face. He couldn't believe it, he had lost his best friend. He leaned over Dracos body and put an arm around Pansy and started to cry onto her shoulder softly.

Dumbledore looked over at Snape and then said, "We have to bring young Mr. Malfoy and Miss. Malfoy to the hospital." When Ron and Harry went to go pick up Draco, Pansy just clung on to him even harder and screamed, "GET AWAY FROM HIM. HE IS DEAD HEADMASTER, AND IT'S ALL THE BLOODY TRIO'S FAULT. ALL POTTER AND WEASLEY'S FAULT, THEY DON'T CARE THAT HE'S DEAD, THERE PROBERLY GLAD HE IS, THEIR DICKHEADS… THROW THEM OUT. DO SOMTHING!!" She was crying so much now that she started to struggle to breathe.

Blaize looked at her and shucked his head, he then picked up Draco's body and carried him over to Snape and passed him into his arms. Snape looked down at the boy, a strange feeling came to his black eyes, and thick tears fell down his harsh face. He moved a hand through Draco's famous white blond hair, slowly turned around taking Draco with him.

Blaize just stood there and watched Snape take away Draco. He was just frozen there in place. After a long time, he turned back round and scoped the tiny body of Tanzi Malfoy in his arms and gave Pansy a sad look. Pansy was now crying on Hermione's shoulder to the shocked of everyone.

Though the two girls had a tiny smile on their face from the expression of everyone, they still had tears streaming down their cheeks.

They all took Tanzi to the hospital except from Harry and Ron who stayed behind, refusing to go with them as they thought she was just as good dead. When they said there beliefs they both got evil glares from the group as they walked away from the two Griffindors.

One week later:

Tanzi was still in her coma, but as Blaize watched her she started to twist and turn, the dream she was must of been a bad dream. Blaize sat up and laid a hand on hers to reasure her evernthough she was asleep. He hadn't slept in three days as he had constantly been in the hospital wing watching over her. He wanted to be there and protect her. It's what Draco would of wanted.

Tanzi's dream…

_She was standing in the middle of the Quidditch field as she looked up, she saw her brother walking towards her. He looked just the way she had seen him last, handsome with a smirk placed on his face. He was standing right infront of her now, but she didn't understand, he was so close but somehow she felt if she reach out to touch him he would disappear. A broomstick appear by his side and he took off into the sky. She watched as him as he flew through the air, he looked so happy._

_Draco smiled, he might be gone but he knew he would always be there with her forever, she was his sister, he would always look after her, he was no angel but he wasn't a ghost either. Somehow his soul had carried on and came to her dreams. How? Well he had no idea._

_He slowly flew down and settled a few meters away from her and smiled and asked, "Hey, Tan…. I really think it's about time you woke up… don't you?" He gave her one of his famous smirks, "You know, I can't be there to greet you and I am sorry for that, because I would do anything to hug you right now. However, you have to go on, you need to wake up and live. Live for us both Tan."_

_Tanzi looked at him in shocked. What did he mean he wouldn't be there adn live for them both? Why couldn't he live for himself? She looked back into his face to ask him what he meant but what she saw shocked her. He was slowly disappearing. She reach out to grab him, to stop him from going, but when she reach out to him it was like he was further away than she imagined. She started to run to try and touch him, but he only gave her a weak smile while saying, "I'm sorry Tan, I love you! Goodbye… and remember I will always be there even if you don't see me, Live for us Tan." Then slowly faded out to nothing, he had said what he wanted, though he would be back, always there to haunt her dreams when she needed him._

_Tanzi carried on running as fast as her legs would carry her. She refused to let him go, if she kept on running she would reach him and find him. She wasn't quick enough, he had gone, but she wouldn't give up, so on she ran, but she tripped and fell, pushing out her arms infront of her, waiting for the impact..._

She woke up fast, she sat up in bed and said in a fainted voice "Draco." She felt something on her hand and looked over to see the sleeping form by her bed resting a hand on hers, it was the black brown handsome face of Blaize Zabine, she smiled softly and squeezed his hand lightly. Then letting go of his hand she threw her arms around him and burried her blond head into his shoulder and started to cry. "I miss him" she said slowly, Blaize waking up in shocked looked at her not understand how she knew already about Draco.

"What? How?" He asked slowly still not understanding how she knew, his hand flew to his black hair while he sat there looking in shocked when she said this. Tanzi only gave him a sad smile and whispered, "He said goodbye." The tears started to blur her sight, but she wouldn't let them fall, Draco was right, he would always be there even though she didn't have him there herself.

Blaize laid a soft hand back on top of hers and looked at her, "You know you can cry, theres nothing wrong with crying, sometimes it helps to cry…. and I've got something to tell you." Tanzi looked up at his face, he was gorgeous really, beautiful and he was hers, she smiled and let her arms fly around his neck and hugged him hard while she let her tears finally fall. Blaize just sat there still letting her cry into his shoulder, he didn't know what to do, so he just blurted out, "I love you Tanzi." As soon as he had said this she froze for a second but then hugged him closer, "to early?," he then added when she didn't answer it.

Tanzi slowly let go of his neck and looked into his eyes deeply, and gave a weak smile. His deep brown eyes were so warm and caring, eventhough he came across as a bad boy. He truly wasn't though, he was the complete opposite infact. He was nice, gorgeous, beautiful, all a girl could want. "No it was not too early" she replied in a weak soft voice.


End file.
